Tuesday, September 7, 2010

Big Mama

I have no interesting blog topics and no recent pictures to post. So, instead I'm posting a picture of myself from one year ago this week, and thanking God that I am not in this condition this summer when it's been the hottest one in years. Just looking at this picture makes me ache and sweat.

Go ahead and stare. And let me point out that although it looks like I must surely have put the camera down and went straight to the hospital and delivered that day, because WOW, I look full term. I was not...I was only 34 weeks here...five weeks away from delivery. I was gawked at all the time, and the really brazen strangers would make comments to me on a regular basis on how huge I was. I was asked constantly if I was carrying twins, if I was due any day, if I was expecting to make it to my due date. I finally learned to let those things roll of my back and not hurt my feelings. I carried *mostly* all out front with both my pregnancies, but especially with Presley, and she was a pretty hefty baby on top of that (8lbs, 5oz). I wish I had a really amazing "after" picture of me with ridiculously toned abs, but such a photo does not exist (sigh).

Strangely enough though, as hard and hot as it was being pregnant throughout the entire summer, I loved (for the most part) being pregnant the second time around. I experienced pretty much every pregnancy discomfort there is, and I will not list them all here so as to keep some of my dignity, but I went through it all. Still, I think with a second (and third, and fourth, etc) pregnancy comes a lot of perspective that you don't have with a first. You know that all the aches, all the pains, all the nausea, all the lost sleep, all the money spent on antacids...it's all gonna be worth it in the end. You know first hand, because you've experienced it once already, that what you're getting in the end (a little piece of heaven that will call you "mama") is worth the price you're paying, and that kind of takes the edge off of some of the discomfort. It's hard to really know that the first time around having never experienced it...people can tell you all day long, "it'll all be worth it", but that just irritated me during my first pregnancy. I'm not saying I didn't complain, I certainly did my fair share of that, but I didn't wallow in my misery and feel sorry for myself like I did the first time around. Perspective.

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